Frugal Gardening - Bluebells and Ferns

I LOVE this time of the year and my wooded areas are now quite colorful a few years after I added a number of bluebells and ferns. In both cases, these wonderful plants spread readily in shady spots. So when I drove around surrounding areas, I often would see a yard stuffed with one or the other and salivate with wanting that look. One day I saw a yard just a sea of bluebells and on the spot found some paper and a pen and wrote a note asking if I could buy some clumps, leaving my phone number. I got a call within a day and the person was glad to sell me as many as I wanted. We ended up agreeing on $20 for about a 10 foot square area that she wanted to have dug out for something else anyway. That got me an entire trunkful. Later, in the spring, on a garden website, someone mentioned you could by bulk bluebells as starter roots on eBay. I contacted a seller, and they said if I bought 100, they would drop the price to 35 cents each. It was a great deal as the plants are usually $4 or $5 each at a nursery and you can only buy them in the spring as they go dormant in the summer.

A bit later, I was craving a ferny glade of my own and saw another house with ferns cramped in large numbers all around the basement. Another note, and this time I also offered to trade if that would be preferable. As it turned out, the person was thrilled to trade for hostas and I was thrilled to get the ferns. So a win/win.

Now these plants have established themselves and I give them as gifts to fellow gardeners, sell them at my plant sale, and cut them to decorate the house. They will continue to multiply for years and I now put some in pots for early spring color. So that note and original $20 has long since paid off. If you have your eye on some perennial and your heart set on have loads of them, consider driving about the neighborhood. Chances are if someone already has oodles of the same plant, they'll be happy to sell or trade for something they don't have.

Good wishes! Eileen

Can I do this for free?

As I was organizing my bookshelves today, I came across the book "How I Lived a Year on Just a Pound a Day" by Kath Kelly. It was inspiring to see how much creativity she used and how she did actually succeed, sometimes on less than a pound a day. So it was on my mind today and the thought, "Can I do this for free?" popped up several times.

My brother had called to say he'd forgotten his sunglasses here at Easter and would I mail them. So I thought, "Can I do this for free?" (sans postage) and the answer was yes. I had a box sitting out to recycle and a found a grocery sack (harder to find now that we bring our own bags but my mom saves them for me too). Turned the bag inside out, wrapped the box, and there you go, all set to mail - for free;-). And as is usually the case with frugality, the Earth's resources get a break too. Good wishes! Eileen

No Shopping Venues

My six-year-old Kirk has found the joys of garage sales and thrift stores where fifty cents can buy a new (to him) toy or two books and five dollars can garner a bike or a scooter. That's good as far as his ability to judge the buying power of money and the incredible difference between buying new and used. He's also sold on the environmental benefits of shopping the local church sale for his various wants and needs. Recently, he proudly brought home his Earth Day poster from school that proclaimed "BUY USED" with pictures of his various treasures.

But I worry when I see him become more interested in the entertainment value of shopping to the exclusion of other things. Last month we went to a museum and walked through an amazing display of dinosaur artifacts with Kirk asking every few minutes, "Can we go to the gift shop now?" (In full disclosure, I visited my dear friend Emelia in New Mexico a few years back. One day later I was talking about our visit to the Georgia O'Keefe museum. She said, "Eileen, don't you remember the museum was closed and we just visited the gift shop and bought some posters?"--oops!)

In an effort to help Kirk expand his entertainment horizons beyond shopping and the need to bring something home when we go on an outing, I've been making a list of nature activities and nature areas that we can visit this summer. Last weekend we biked to a duck marsh. Admittedly Kirk asked several times if we could get home so he could play a computer game on PBS kids, but mostly we enjoyed the warm weather and sunshine.

Hopefully by helping him find value in things that do not involve acquiring yet more material goods, I will reinforce this for myself...though maybe not until after I take a quick pass through that amazing subdivision sale next Saturday morning.....

Shifting around life dreams

It's been almost a week now since we learned the final IVF failed. It's been such a roller coaster year, more than a year actually. It started with the dream/hope of a third child, especially a daughter, then doctor visits upon visits, shots upon shots, an empty pink picture frame to be filled and pair of maternity jeans for a sort of new-age visualization boost. Then hoping, waiting, wondering.

One of the ironic costs of all that waiting and wondering is that I sometimes wasn't there emotionally as much as I could have been for the two beautiful children I already have been blessed with. I was so worried and hopeful and so attached to the someday visions of the little sister they were going to have, of her dolls, dollhouses, and pink dresses, she and I taking a coffee break together while shopping for her college clothes (I don't even drink coffee), Anika and Greg dancing at her wedding, that I often lost sight of the moment I was in.

So I ask myself the lessons to take from this. Obviously there is the importance of being in the moment. How many little real moments did I trade for these "Someday" moments I was creating in my head? Another is the lesson of gratitude. Imagine if all this had gone on eight and four years ago and I'd never had my sweet, wonderful two boys? A friend's husband was in a terrible accident a bit over a year ago. He is now in a wheelchair, unable to feed himself or use a bathroom. She says she looks back now and wonders if the accident had never happened, would she have continued to live day to day, taking for granted the blessings of health and mobility, of having a husband she could take a walk through the woods with? She is adjusting to a new reality and trying to find those happy moments in the moments as they unfold, taking less for granted.

A final lesson is one in detachment. Greg went to a Jesuit retreat awhile back and they talked a lot about the importance of detachment, of not putting your happiness into things outside yourself. In the abstract, this makes a lot of sense. No one and nothing should dictate your happiness. You choose to be happy or not. But then I think that many things outside me do make me happy: Greg, the kids, my parents, my garden, a good book, talking with a friend, walking my dog, working on my book with an iced tea and raisin bagel at my side. Without those and hundreds of others, surely I would have fewer happy moments in my life. But detachment is about the grasping, clinging, fearful quality of the wish that must come true for happiness to be felt. And I get that too.

So, signing off today, I endeavor to stay more in the moment, appreciate the myriad of blessings that I am constantly surrounded with, and let go and let God as to my dreams of a daughter.

Good wishes on all your journeys! Eileen

Bit blue

Our third and final attempt at IVF failed and I find myself going through a grieving process. It certainly makes me appreciate our two sons even more than ever. Good wishes. Eileen

Happy milestone!! Just sent manuscript to agent!

Happy milestone! Just sent off the first three chapters to an agent. It's been a long journey! He said they usually get back within four or five weeks. Happy wishes to everyone on their journeys! Eileen

The "ouch" factor in rejection...;-)

I went to a wonderful conference this weekend for writers in which we could sign up to pitch to agents. The first one I pitched was very kind. He's a new agent from the Midwest who doesn't do my genre, but was willing to have me send the first three chapters to take a look. So Friday was a high.

Today, the agent was from Los Angeles. I waited my turn and sat across the table from him. (It's set up a lot like a job interview.) I'd gotten one sentence into my pitch "A boy who travels in time to save the American Revolution" when he help up his hand and told me to stop right there. He doesn't "do" science fiction. Taken off guard and feeling lame -had I missed this on his website or conference blurb? I tried for another sentence to talk about the historical angle. Exasperated sigh on his end. Then a slowing down of his speaking pace (implication - can't talk too fast with dimwits;-) Finally, his reply, "You just don't get it, do you? Time travel is not reality. I deal with reality." Silence. End of pitch as he shuffled his papers for the next person. So I left two and a half minutes into my allotted eight minutes, pink faced and mortified in front of the fifteen others waiting in chairs. The timer, apparently thrown off, asked if I was done or what? "Um...Yes." A few tears later (I know, how pathetic to cry over this when there are true tragedies out there - blame it on hormones) I drove home and enjoyed seeing the fam.

Before the pitch, sweaty palms and nervous stomachs all around, a group of ten or more of us were milling around waiting for our time, it occurred to me I would not have what it takes to be in the entertainment business - singing, acting, comedy. You'd have to have such an enormously strong ego to take inevitable rejection. During our lunch yesterday, the speaker noted that Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance was turned down not 10, not 50, not 100, but over 120 times before it was published, so she said we need to thank all the creative types that don't give up and keep striving despite rejections, to get their work out there. Agreed!

Schuler Books Weblog had the lovely list of rejections (some of which I listed below), the perfect salve for the wounded writer's soul. 1. Stephen King

Mr. King received dozens of rejections for his first novel, Carrie; he kept them tidily nailed to a spike under a timber in his bedroom.

One of the publishers sent Mr. King’s rejection with these words:

We are not interested in science fiction which deals with negative utopias. They do not sell.

2. William Golding

Mr. Golding’s Lord of the Flies was rejected by 20 publishers. One denounced the future classic with these words (which should be inscribed on the hapless publisher’s tomb):

an absurd and uninteresting fantasy which was rubbish and dull.

5. Joseph Heller

In an act of almost unparalleled stupidity, one publisher wrote of Mr. Heller’s Catch-22:

I haven’t the foggiest idea about what the man is trying to say…Apparently the author intends it to be funny – possibly even satire – but it is really not funny on any intellectual level.

6. J.K. Rowling

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s (later Sorceror’s) Stone was rejected by a dozen publishers, including biggies like Penguin and HarperCollins. Bloomsbury, a small London publisher, only took it on at the behest of the CEO’s eight-year old daughter, who begged her father to print the book. God bless you, sweetheart.

Okay, a couple hours, an iced Diet Coke and few slices of pizza later, I realize the pettiness of this and have shaken off the angst;-).

Getting finances back on track.

Taking a break now that the manuscript is off and getting our finances back in order. Turns out our Quicken program has gotten so complex, some things automatically downloaded, others didn't, that we are having to hand enter a lot of stuff, but that's good for keeping tabs.

I feel 100 percent better getting those numbers back in line! My new goal is three steps to FI each day. During the past couple days, I found several exemptions we'd missed for taxes, updated and corrected some of the Quicken information, started file for business expenses, and did some of my own home repairs (putting in new weather strip at front door - but now the door is really hard to close and the kids keep leaving it open a crack - so I'm not sure the real savings on this;-).

I also started cleaning the fridge and to date have tossed $10 worth of food. On the plus side, Greg and I agreed no lunches out this week and so I cooked like a fiend on Sunday - enchiladas, pasta salad, spinach mushroom casserole, German potato salad - (handy to have multiple crock pots) so we're good to go on this.

Greg and the kids have started their own "baseball club" to meet each night, which they love. Kai and I love our non-agitator washing machine with clear lid;-).

Goal is four hours of writing today, so I'll sign off. Good wishes.

Milestone - Just sent off my 236 page manuscript for summer class!

Each step is a good feeling. Just finished last spell check of the 236 page manuscript and sent it off for the summer class - (today was the deadline) along with as story summary. Now I'm going off to read a fun romance book, with nothing to do with the American Revolution;-) Good wishes on all our journeys. Eileen

Steps forward, steps back, doing the shuffle;-)

Hello out there. I haven't fallen off the planet. I know several of you blog too, so you'll understand the fall off the wagon thing;-)

I went to a writer's conference this past weekend. We got feedback both from the speaker, who is a published author in young adult - best selling author I should add - as well as a writing teacher from a nearby college. The feedback to me would be generously termed "lukewarm". They definitely found a lot of problems and issues that need work, so will be plugging onward there.

The retreat was held at a Catholic retreat center, so bare bones accommodations, but it was nice to just focus solely on writing for two days and also meet so many other local writers, both published and hopefuls like me.

Greg and I worked out another budget today, which I was really happy about. Our focus on FI has really taken a backseat to the idea for the company first, then for my writing. I dislike the feeling that we're not keeping a tight eye on things, working with a specific plan, so today's work to have specific numbers in each category was a relief.

We are having some "handymen" jobs being done and for some odd reason, that sort of thing always stresses me out. They found five of the posts to the porch completely rotted, the new storm door didn't fit properly, and when they went to shut off the main water to fix a house filter, they turned the wrong knob (ancient one in 30 year old house probably never turned on before) and it's started a slow drip so I probably need to call in a plumber. Wow, reading that sounds so petty considering all the true troubles in the world.

To turn toward the positive, I have set a goal to do two items focused on FI each day, starting today, and to get in a minimum of 20 hours a week on the book. The kids are doing great. Kirk's teacher told me he is now several grades ahead in both reading and math, so all those mini-lessons we do each night must be paying off. Both kids are spending a few days with their grandparents at the farm as it's spring break and I think they are all enjoying it-with a few "moments" thrown in of brothers' fighting, having to bring them to an eye appointment that went late and the impossible task of keeping a 3 and 7 year old entertained in an optometrists office for almost an hour. My mother in law is awesome, awesome, awesome, and always manages all this with great grace.

Good wishes!

More Happy News!

I was accepted to an intensive one-week writing course this summer. My wonderful mother-in-law graciously said she'd love to have the kids visit that week. I had to be okayed by three different instructors, so that was a feeling of accomplishment. Good wishes to each of you on your own journeys. Those baby steps add up over time! Right now I'm working through the "Writing the Breakout Novel workbook" and finding it extremely helpful.

A step forward!

I was so happy to get some really positive feedback from a writing instructor here at the University. She said the last few chapters were 95 percent publishable! That was music to my ears, now just need to up it that last five percent. I'll be going to a writer's retreat weekend toward the end of the month and hopefully there will be enough help there to get that boost. I'm walking on air! Good wishes.

Putting those left-over Panera cups to good frugal use - winter sowing. Happy thoughts of spring.

Good wishes! Eileen

Kirk turns 7!

Kirk enjoying his "birthday breakfast waffle" this morning. He's got to be the sweetest kid on the planet. He enjoyed an unexpected day home yesterday as the teachers had a walk-out for union contract issues. He was very worried they'd be on strike for his birthday and he wouldn't get to bring in his treats;-).

Greg is in NY learning about licensing issues at a conference. We're quite far from anything like that, but he wanted to get the lay of the land so to speak. Sometimes it all seems so impossibly hard and far away, but step by step I keep reminding myself.

I am applying for a one week summer writing course here in Madison that I've heard great things about. You submit 20 pages of the novel and a one page summary and have to get okayed by three professors, so wish me luck.

Happy days all around.

Scary sugar stats

I went to a "tame your sweet tooth" seminar at the local school and it was an eye opener. First, she showed us teaspoonful by teaspoonful, how much sugar was in a 20 ounce Pepsi (one of my favorites) and YIKES!

Then she went through additional sugar facts. Here are a few excerpts from the handouts.
1. Sugar can suppress the immune system and destroy germ killing ability for up to five hours after ingesting (she didn't quote the amount here).

2. Sugar contributes to weight issues because when you have excess insulin in your blood, cells can't release their fat into the bloodstream.

3. High insulin levels can decrease the body's ability to absorb nutrients from other foods.

4. Cravings for sugar are often caused by a lack of water.

5. If you chew your food 25 times per bite you will reduce your cravings for sugar because you will be releasing natural sugars in the healthier foods you eat.

6. Cinnamon is a blood sugar stabilizer and will lend a sweet flavor to your foods.

7. The chemicals in diet foods are just plain scary!

Happy Superbowl Sunday!

We welcomed superbowl sunday by making that wonderful vegan chili that Vermont Cottage blog posted - YUM!! Then made two other recipes from Fat Free Vegan website, so we are well stocked with vegan meals for the week. I saw the vegan challenge on Oprah and thought we'd try it for a week. Super healthy, super frugal food!

Kirk and Kai are back to swim lessons for the winter - not cheap, but a lifelong skill.

At church the first graders read the petitions at church today - Kirk was so proud. They are working on a donkey project, where they work to earn money to send to Ghana for women to use donkeys in the fields for planting. I have mixed feelings - certainly wanting to help the women, but the donkeys don't look really happy in the pictures. Then free donuts after church to celebrate the kids' good work. I go to a stop eating so much sugar $11 community class on Wednesday night - so this was my last big sugar kick - delicious. Only Greg was strong enough to abstain;-)

The King's Speech

Just got back from seeing this movie. Loved, loved, loved it. Definitely talks to the will of some special people to "do the right thing" and overcome adversity.

Blizzard Conditions - Welcome February;-)

We are under blizzard conditions with up to 12 inches expected over the next 24 hours or so. My neighbor and I braved it for our evening walk - and kind of enjoyed the other-worldliness of it all. Coming into my warm foyer, this picture of my grandpa as an infant made me think how tough our grandparents/great-grandparents were, toughing out these conditions without central heating or indoor plumbing!

A Frugal Day!

It was good to be home. The kids both stayed home; they had minor colds and we all missed each other, so it was a good bonding day.

I baked like a fiend. Kai and I made banana bread to use up all the frozen bananas that had started to get too ripe and two pumpkin breads to use up half a bag of walnuts. Then I made the "tightwad gazette quiche", which turned out awful - I over cooked it. I insisted the kids eat a bit if they wanted cake. Kirk took one big bite and threw up, I'm not kidding. Compliments to the chef....;-) The remaining pan was left out on the deck for the birds and squirrels.

Otherwise, we made conscious effort not to waste. I made salmon patties to use up half a jar of bread crumbs and we reused the bath water for Brandi's bath. I find when I'm not wasteful (even when it doesn't make a lot of difference financially) I just feel better about life.

Good wishes! Supposed to be a big snowstorm tomorrow, so we may have another stay at home day. Kids loved the light bright sets I'd gotten at a garage sale this summer and stashed for just a winter day like today. Kirk has been choosing to sleep in Kai's room lately and they call it a sleep over party.... Eileen

Take away lessons from conference.

Today was day one of the conference, and it was definitely inspiring to hear from some great authors/illustrators. My takeaway from the break out sessions with editors and agents was that your focus should be writing a great book. The gimmicks about marketing, query letters, contracts, etc. is far, far down the list. Numbers 1-10 should just be writing well.

I really enjoyed one of the key speakers, Jules Feiffer, both writer and illustrator (he did the pictures for Phantom Tollbooth). At 83, it is so clear how much joy he finds in his work, which he calls play. He said he goes into the process unafraid, in fact expecting, it may not work, but also knowing inside he'll make it work, even if it doesn't the first four or five times.

The other take away, oddly enough, is how nice it is to have less stuff to manage. I brought three dresses and a coat. I have no stuffed closets, no knickknacks, no crammed drawers of stuff to deal with - I can see the appeal of living simply for writers;-).

Good wishes to all. Tomorrow is day two, then I have a six o'clock evening flight back to Wisconsin.
Eileen

Hello from the Big Apple

Hello from the Big Apple. The International Children's Writers conference starts tomorrow and I am in three small group sessions in which I will be able to meet agents, editors and other writers, which I'm quite excited about.

The trip is not too terribly expensive. I bundled the airfare with a hotel (2 star), which saved a lot. And although the hotel is the most no frill of no frills, sort of like a youth hostel, it is only a short way from the convention, so I can walk. And there is a wonderful airport bus that for $5 (plus $3 tip) got me to within 1/2 block of my hotel - got to love public transport.

I stopped by the beautiful NY public library for awhile this afternoon to see an exhibit about Marie Curie that was really interesting (and free). Now I'm up in my room on the 28th floor and can see the McGraw/Hill headquarters so hopefully that is a good omen;-).

Best wishes. Eileen

Off to New York City tomorrow to the Int. Writer's Conference

I am excited and a bit nervous, a bit disappointed the whole thing is taking so long (I was there last year for the toy fair), but try to keep reminding myself all good things take time. Ironically, I was watching Oprah's Master Classes and Simon Cowell was on and he said patience was the key to success. He said he'd been interviewing someone for his company and said, "You start at the bottom, but in ten, fifteen years, you can really be making some money and know the industry." He said the young man looked at him like he was crazy - ten years!!! - didn't six months sound better;-). I can relate! Sometimes my blog is a reminder that I've been at this a long time with no real breakthroughs and that can be disheartening . . . and a good reminder that the journey is the key. Good wishes to all! Eileen

A Happy New Year!

Wishing everyone a happy 2011. I turned 43 the past week and feel very blessed in my life. I'm excited about improving my writing and watching the kids grow and learn, trying to be more in the moment and more focused on the good in each moment. I went to a dinner last night with six other women, all trying to start businesses and realize there are many kindred spirits in the world. Happy journeying to all of us. Best wishes. Eileen

Some disappointments - some blessings

I submitted some of my story to a professional writer who teaches a class. She sent back very detailed feedback, but also was blunt in that the book is simply not ready to be sent out. It has a lot of challenges, both big and small. So I will still go to NY to "network", but I will not submit the book. On the plus side, I am staring anew with some very good directives like having a specific point of view for each chapter, to put more conflict within scenes to drive the story forward, to use dialogue more naturally (I have some long patches that border soliloquies) and to tighten up the motivations of the characters.

A blessing was someone calling who had found my i-phone on the street in front of the bookstore where I attended my first writers' critique group. I'm so happy to have my phone back! I'm not sure if the group is the best fit for me, but I appreciated their very supportive attitude.

So good wishes. Remember even two steps forward and one back is still a step forward;-). Good wishes. Eileen